The Summer Story of Kyle Liao in 2022 as of August 20th, 2022.

As I write this I am currently ill with some sort of viral illness. Probably a cold or the flu, since two days of at home covid tests kits say I most certainly do not have covid.

Some might remark my summer as eventful. I got a 5 on the AP world exam, a 1490 on the SAT, I got my first job, I’m starting a fiscally sponsored organization; all of those things are crazy and I wouldn’t have seen myself doing them 6 months ago. I was contempt with getting a 3 or 4 on the AP exam, a 1400 would have made me happy, I got rejected from the CS4ALL internship program, and I joined hack club slack let’s say two months ago and when Ced @hackclubhq, brought up starting a club I said hands down “its not for me”.

Despite all this, I still have regets. I haven’t been eating the healthiest. It would be nice to be jacked. My duolingo streak on mandarin might be in the 180s as of now, but I’m only at the first checkpoint. I haven’t been applying to scholarships on goingmerry. I haven’t made plans for college in writing. I haven’t prepared for the classes I have for junior year: precalc, AP US, physics. In every aspect of what I have been doing and what I haven’t been doing, I wish I could be doing more.

It’s not realistic nor sustainable to be doing more than I’m doing right now at this moment. I’ve realized this is likely the most productive I’ll ever be. I don’t have to make meals, I can sleep a full 8 hours(9PM-5AM), etc.

What this summer has taught me is I need to cutdown on quantity. I more or less did, just unintentionally and not in the most mentally positive way. While I have it listed on my about page all these different things I’m working on, I can’t take all of them on at once. I can’t try to do a little bit of each every day, it just doesn’t work for me. Some items on the agenda like exercise, duolingo, and school are a daily persistant matter regardless, but I don’t have do tryhackme, SEC+ studying, and JNCIA all at the same time. Or arduino programming and python programming either. This is more or less just random thoughts. It’s not curated or editted to the same fashion I write other things in. I reuse the same words, I write random stuff. This sentence abruptly begins. I’m not even sure if I have convinced my concious that I need to in lehman’s terms, “chill the fuck out and just take on a few things at a time”

For context, my plan to “cutdown” is to run in the early mornings, do duolingo before leaving, read my SEC+ study guide on the bus ride to school, go to school, get hw done during school, finish hw or study for school on the busride back, study as needed when I get home, and then either do JNCIA-SEC training(which i need to be done with by oct 16) or work on hack club edison, and finish off the day doing whatever if I’m just done with it or read one of my many books. Then use the weekend as a buffer for social things, events, taking a break, and making up for whatever I haven’t been able to get done during the school week. We will see how it goes. I may have to postpone the sec+ reading in order to use that time for school or JNCIA-sec or Hack Club, etc. That’s roughly 40 minutes each way after all. It all depends on how intensive my classes are(I don’t expect them to be that bad, AP US, precalc, and physics are certainly not the hardest classes I could have opted into), how much better or worse the bus service is, and how well I can delegate hack club edison tasks.

“if it aint a hell yes, its a hell no” i should make a failure diary, but honestly thats just too much work for me so this post will suffice.

I’m gonna deal with next week, then take a week off for a family trip, then use the last week prepping for school and continuing my many hats. That will be this summer in a nutshell. So help me god*

but, this weekend, I’m sick and I just finished my internship so I’m just gonna sit back and relax(as much as an ill person can).

out of the night that covers me

black as the pit from pole to pole

i thank whatever gods* may be

for my unconquerable soul

in the fell clutch of circumstance

i have not winced nor cried aloud

under the bludgeonings of chance

my head is bloody but unbowed

beyond this place of wrath and tears

looms but the horror of the shade

and yet the menace of the years

finds and shall find me unafraid

it matters not how straight the gate

how charged with punishments the scroll

i am the master of my fate

i am the captain of my soul

invictus

-henley